Winter
My name is ?Yuan Quan. I like winter best.Because l can play in ?the snow and make ?a snowman. ?Winter ?is white and ? pretty.My mam ?and sister ?also like winter.I often make a snowman and play in the snow on winter. Sometimes I go shopping ?with my family.
修改后：My name is ?Yuan Quan. I like winter best. Because l can play with the snow and make ?a snowman.? In winter, the world is all white. My mum ?and sister also like winter. We often make snowmen and have a snowball fight together.?It is very interesting.
修改老师：Crystal 老师?
????五年级:袁泉
Winter
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